Let’s face it, we’ve all felt overwhelmed over the past few months. None of us are superhuman. It’s normal (and totally OK) to let things get on top of us sometimes.
The important thing is knowing how to pick ourselves up again and move forward. As a Positive Transitions life coach I have given some expert advice to the Tesco magazine June issue to help boost your resilience.
“You can’t always control what’s happening to you, but you can control how you react to it”
The first step to being more resilient is to specifically work out what is difficult for you – it’s not always as easy as it sounds. Identify what it is, how it makes you feel, what would
things be like without it, and what’s the alternative? For example, on the surface it may be that work has become quite stressful, but the truth is you’re just finding it hard to work from home and juggle childcare, and not seeing your friends and family. Look at ways to divide up your day so you have set times for work and set times for childcare rather than trying to juggle everything all at once, and talk to your manager about your new timetable.
Next you have to accept how you feel. It’s OK to feel this way; the key is to recognise you have a choice. Of course, you can’t always control what’s happening to you and around
you, but you can control the way you react to it. Identify exactly what you want instead of this present difficulty
Deciding to act upon something that isn’t working for you is a positive step in building up your resilience. Even if you only decide for now that you are not going to stay as you are, that’s a good start!
4. Motivate and Believe
To help you take action, you need to find your motivation. Some like being in nature to feel motivated. Just sitting somewhere alone helps some people believe things are possible. Others talk things through with friends or family. Once you find your motivation and believe it is possible to resolve your difficulty, you’ve developed your resilience.
How do you continue to be resilient when things seem to go from bad to worse? Firstly recognise that in life nothing stays the same. When times are tough you can be certain
that they will get better. And when things start to get difficult again, go back to the steps above. Reviewing your choices and actions each night keeps things achievable, believable and creates a new habit of resilience.
Talking and sharing problems with others can be incredibly powerful in strengthening your ability to persevere when things get tough. This may be just over the phone or video
chat at the moment, but when you share your struggles with people, it’s amazing how many will reach out to support you. And when you share your goals or dreams, they will push you to try harder to realise them.